09/23

Maybe one day you’ll grow up,

That would be a sight to see.

Maybe one day you’ll grow up,

Learn some accountability.

I tried to make it work but this time it’s clear to me,

Our nine lives are over and you were never the one for me

 You never even fought for me.

Childish and petty.

Too much Tit for tat,

You and me.

I was somehow always waiting for an apology.

I always thought you’d prove to me,

That maybe there was something more here than just history

Your silence should’ve said it all to me.

From the man who talked about our future,

I was your wife to be?

Remember?

A house,  A dog, parents of 3?

I was stupid to buy the dreams you sold to me,

Especially when your actions never matched your words in entirety.

My feelings weren’t weapons.

They were never meant to hurt you.

But I took the punishment,

Even though I didn’t deserve to.

I was tired of always having to eat my words.

I was a grown woman, not a little girl,

trying to reason with a grown man who had all the excuses in the world.

2-3 days always seemed numbed the hurt,

Bandaids on bullet wounds triggered by previous words.

It never failed.

Nothing was ever healed,

The cycle would just always continue.

You’d come back to me,

And I to you,

Weak enough to say yes, even though I knew we were through.

The last time should’ve been the last time that I dealt with disrespect from you.

You begged me to open up,

But you could never do the same, right?

A gaslighter with charm and no accountability in sight.

I’ll take some of the blame,

My tact wasn’t always present, right?

I took part in a lot of the games.

But how could you even sleep at night?

Knowing what we’ve been through, not even put up a fight?

I had to leave,

This shit was suffocating me. It became a trigger for my anxiety.

I no longer trusted you with my heart.

I meant what I said,

We needed to be apart.

I’m really sorry for how I did it,

but I could not stay in limbo with you for another minute.

R.I.P to what we couldn’t be.

I buried us on 09/23.

XoXo, LovePeaceMascara💜

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